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War 

  
“For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places.”‭‭Ephesians‬ ‭6:12‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

http://bible.com/114/eph.6.12.nkjv

When you are trying to walk in light and speak life into situations a few things happen. You are tested on what you believe, what you see, what you think. I am humbled by my recent life experiences. I have been in spiritual warfare so heavy and I found myself unprepared and unsuspecting. Perhaps I had become so complacent in my walk, slightly arrogant in my faith and closeness with the Lord. I went from I need you for everything to well no God only theses things and areas. Funny how my ability to give an encouraging word to others did not manifest daily as went through my most recent battle. Everything I knew and know to be true about God was questioned, twisted so to speak. I begin to see myself as one of little faith as my tribulations and trials became bigger. Fighting spiritual battles in the flesh is impossible. I repeat impossible. I knew this but day after day I wrestled with the enemy, I showed up for every fight. I stood on the frontline without my breastplate of righteousness, my belt of truth, my shield of faith, and my sword. I suddenly found myself back peddled into a space of repetition. Like a hamster on a wheel trying to save a loved one that really wasn’t for me to save.  The doubt created in the circumstance was only one that the enemy could devise. Even though I knew it I saw this movie before so to speak and I knew how it would end I found myself believing I could alter the ending. This time would be different. He didn’t mean to throw that pot, he accidentally pushed me, his anger is just a struggle…it will get better. If he didn’t love me he wouldn’t buy me nice expensive things. A purse is not worth enduring a flying pot. 3 diamond rings is not worth devastation and lack of peace. It will get better I said, but It didn’t. Now here I lay wounded, heartbroken, a bit fragile, and wondering how had I gotten myself so caught up.  We have all been there all done that… Or have we? Some run at the flags, some see them and take it as a personal mission to fix a person, and sadly many stay and many die. Domestic violence is real. It happens daily and many live in secret and shame because of fear of the abuser and embarrassment among loved ones. It doesn’t have to be this way though. Im free. I’m safe. I’m healing and my trust and faith in God along with loving friends and family helped me through. The war though still continues. This is the last time I will be in an abusive relationship. I will still stand on the frontline. This time I will be clothed in the armor.  The weak areas that I desperately tried to hide from God have been uncovered and I am positive that He will restore. I’m writing to get this out, but I’m also rejoicing because I have a praise on my lips and joy in my heart. I’m thankful for the life I have been given and eternally grateful that what was meant for evil and designed to destroy drew me closer to the lover of my soul and captain of my sea: Jesus Christ. Your story may not be my story, but the instruction manual is still the same yesterday, today , and forever. So I pray my loins stay girded and you all are girded as well. Peace and Blessings.
Written in love

Be Blessed

Truth

5 Blessing 5 months

It’s been months since I wrote, 5 to be exact. Funny how 5 symbolizes God’s grace, goodness, and favor. Ironically what kept me from writing was choosing Love. I know I always seem to be on this chase and pursuit of Love. Love comes from God and I have plenty of that all around and so again I find myself loving someone who could not and did not stay. I’m trying to spread that love and it’s a challenge. So was it really love anyway. Yes, it was and is. But sometimes things just can’t work, especially if working with a different definition and a different source.  A topic for another day. While I would love to rehash the account. I won’t. It’s something I released  to the Lord. In the midst of my heart condition around dating issues God showed up! 1) God led me to a new church home for enhanced spiritual nurturing and teaching I had become weak. 2) I received a job another blessing! After months of searching I had stopped. Then someone sought me out for a job. Praise God. 3) My case closed for my volunteer work and the child I work with will be adopted! 4) I was blessed with a new place to live 5) I celebrated 35 years in September. So yup that’s 5 things that happened in 5 months while the obstacles were humongous my God is bigger. He gave me so many “hugs” along the way. So much encouragement even through my tears! So as I approach Thanksgiving and I reflect on these past few months. I am reminded about alignment and the plans I have for myself. I planned to fall in love and be married because 35 was approaching. I planned to stay at my former job for more than 4 years. I planned to have children. BUT, Jeremiah 29:11 NLT reminded me : For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. This scripture always gives me comfort because it means that God always has my best interest in mind. It  helps me sleep at night for sure! It reminds me that in Him I live, and I’m nothing without him. 

Peaceful Heart

A peaceful heart leads to a healthy body; jealousy is like cancer in the bones. (NLT) -Proverbs 14:30
It’s remarkable how medical studies have proven this verse to be true. Practicing optimism or a peaceful heart is actually one way to improve your health. How can we take advantage of this truth? When you find yourself troubled with relationships, deal with the issues quicker. If you are fearful, lean into God’s promises and speak them out loud. If your stress levels are high, exercise to release the tension. Above all, work towards a peaceful heart through Christ.
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Check Your Company

I Corinthians 15:33-34

Do not be deceived: “Evil company corrupts good habits.” Awake to righteousness, and do not sin; for some do not have the knowledge of God. I speak this to your shame.

All week long the Lord has been dealing with me about habits and the company I keep. Naturally, I decided to meditate on this and see what my manna from Heaven says. So in my humble opinion, I have the greatest friends and support group around me. I live thousands of miles away from my hometown in Boston, but I have managed to find me a great church family, some lifelong friends whom I now consider family : shoutouts to Young Palmer, Killah K, Brownie and Waffle. P.s I’m big on nicknames so these have been used to protect the innocent. I spend so much time with
these 4 people and we just click. If you have ever had some really great framily (friends+family) then you know what I’m talking about. These people keep me on my toes and sharpen me spiritually. Then there are my friends and family back home WAY too many to name. I think about the good habits I’ve developed. Those are easy. Before Christ though I had some pretty bad habits…I was bitter, angry, drank too  much, cussed too much, fought too much, I smoked nasty cigarettes, yes (I know gross). I got in my own way all the time, because I believed I was in complete control of anything and everything around me. I was stressed sometimes even depressed. The best thing I ever did was exchange my company I kept. For starters I had to recognize God and recognize that He gave His only son for me. Do you know how much pressure and burdens were lifted from me, just in acknowledging Christ as my Savior. Receiving God’s love and developing a relationship with Him literally forced me to check my company and exchange it for ultimate comforting company: Jesus and his Holy Spirit. The Bible says Be Not Deceived Evil Company corrupts Good Habits. Have you ever backslid into a poor habit, or found your oh so saved self doing things you used to do and then wondering what happened? Well, I have and I had to self evaluate and check my company. Checking your company is not always checking your immediate circle of friends or family either, sometimes checking your company is doing a spiritual read of the holy spirit that dwells in you . IS IT PRESENT AND BEING FED? In other words…what have you been pouring into yourself spiritually, physically, and emotionally. Are you spending enough time with God and asking Him to keep you. There is a song that says “oh to be kept by Jesus
It sings about being in the company of the Lord. We must do this daily. It’s easy to blame our shortcomings, backsliding, and iniquities on others and circumstances, but let us not be deceived that all influences are always other men. YOU (myself included can be your own worse enemy). Nurture yourself regularly and know what God has in store for you. It’s okay to ask others for advice but God has the final say and knows the plans He has for you!

Jeremiah.29.11.nkjv
For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord , thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.

Check your company, your first line of defense and first “person” in your presence should be the Holy Spirit. Its here to guide you. So try to steer away from evil company that corrupts good habits. The best way to do this is to be spiritually strong. Evil spirits can’t be around Good spirits very long.  Scripture tells us  at the name of Jesus, every knee shall bow and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, but it will help if people actually see Jesus in you and that they recognize you dwell in the company of the most high. Just a bit of food for thought!
Be Blessed,
Written with Love
TRUTH

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